Am I writing just to please Kyle?
When did I lose my sense of idealism? Has medical school beaten it out of me like so many other things, or did I just get older and change priorities. A little of both, I imagine. Now I'm not saying I have lost all of my sense of what is right, and my part in it, but the small things have begun to wither.
For example, using paper towels in a public restroom when a hand dryer is available. I used to adamantly use the hand dryer, as using the towels killed trees. I never expected that my actions alone would change anything, but if I didn't pay attention to these small options, then who would? Or, how I truly wanted (and still want) one of the beautifully sewn pairs of seal skin mittens I found in Alaska. When did I become okay with killing animals for fur? Okay, no argument that there is a significant difference between the subsistence lifestyle and utilization of animals in the Arctic compared to the rest of the world, but it is still fur. There are dozens of simillar examples, none of them major, but I also don't think that they are truly inconsequential in the grand scheme of things.
I would like to vote for the apathy driven lifestyle that medical school brings, because it absolves me of any responsibility. Who knows? The things you think about during a 5 hours boat ride followed by a 76 hour car ride.
I have been in Lake Powell/Glen Canyon all week. One of the most spectacuar places I have ever been. Ken and Lisa are getting married tonight. Awesome.
For example, using paper towels in a public restroom when a hand dryer is available. I used to adamantly use the hand dryer, as using the towels killed trees. I never expected that my actions alone would change anything, but if I didn't pay attention to these small options, then who would? Or, how I truly wanted (and still want) one of the beautifully sewn pairs of seal skin mittens I found in Alaska. When did I become okay with killing animals for fur? Okay, no argument that there is a significant difference between the subsistence lifestyle and utilization of animals in the Arctic compared to the rest of the world, but it is still fur. There are dozens of simillar examples, none of them major, but I also don't think that they are truly inconsequential in the grand scheme of things.
I would like to vote for the apathy driven lifestyle that medical school brings, because it absolves me of any responsibility. Who knows? The things you think about during a 5 hours boat ride followed by a 76 hour car ride.
I have been in Lake Powell/Glen Canyon all week. One of the most spectacuar places I have ever been. Ken and Lisa are getting married tonight. Awesome.
posted by rob at 7:04 AM
3 Comments:
There was a phrase that chapped me to no end when I was a youngster. He who is not liberal when young has no heart. He who is still liberal when older has no brain.
It's funny. We don't learn about the world all at once and yet we are rarely willing to restrict ourselves from creating a weltenschaung with our limited knowledge at any one time. We start out with an all-encompassing worldview because we need it. We need a story of the planet that has an important role for us to play. Increasing our knowledge as we get older enriches this story but the scope only rarely changes.
As someone who defined himself from early on in opposition to this idealism of youth, I never really bought into the whole recycle-a-can-and-save-the-earth mentality. But I can definitely see how environmental concerns can elevate one from the terrifying powerlessness that one feels as an adolesecent.
Even if this is not true in and of itself, the fact that the idea now exists in your universe is indicative of how much more complicated your "responsibilities" have become. Meanwhile, the time you have to devote resolving an increasingly complicated world is dwindling.
Luckily for you, modern society has recognized this difficulty and provided you the neccessary tools to resolve the unraveling of your life narrative.
You can drink or smoke pot until your physical state is more suited to your emotional rootlessness.
You can stay incredibly busy working and accumulating goods that divert your attention and offer objective measures of happiness.
You can devote your life to helping other people which gives you a arrogant (but critical) sense of neccessity in the lives of others.
Or, best of all, you can choose the combination of all these things. You can have a child. Not only can you get off on your critical role in their life and stay busy, but you can stem the increasing complication of the moral universe in which you live. With a child, you make the transition from student to teacher. And in teaching others, what remains of your worldview will take on the veneer of authority giving you the sense of understanding that makes living seem . . . er . . . intentional.
Incidentally - you could write for far worse reasons than appeasing my bullying. Starting a blog is not easy. Everything you do seems arrogant and self-indulgent.
But you have to fake it to make it. Before you know it, there are a set of expectations on the part of your adoring public and you are merely meeting those expectations. Which is fun and not so icky.
The worst of it is over. You are developing a style and everone clearly wants more of it. I am jealous.
Kind words, Kyle, thanks.
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